Playoff predictions, Stanley Cup final: Peter vs Ian vs Keith, a coin

After springing out to an early lead with a flawless quarterfinal, I have been humbled by the last couple rounds, including losing my Cup-favorite Dallas Stars last week. Meanwhile, Ian has bounced back from a troll-heavy first round to go two-for-two in the conference final, tying with Keith, who overall has been correct — and this may shock you — in half of his picks.

It all comes down to this: Canada’s last hope vs America’s last resort.

Keith, a coin, is worth 25 cents. What can you buy with 25 cents anymore? I’d say a call on a payphone but I’m not sure that’s right and I’m not sure those even exist anymore. Thus, Keith exists without function, without meaning, without desire, without suffering. From a state of nirvana he gives his predictions, which are just fine as predictions go. He’s from 2002.

And now the results so far. We use the 🚽/🌮 score-keeping system, which everyone understands without explanation.

Florida 🐱 vs Edmonton 🛢️

Peter: I’m crestfallen and bracket-busted after the defeat of my Dallas Stars. Now, for the finals, I’m fully on tilt, making wild and indefensible predictions that defy reason and serve only my delight in the suffering of others. Others today means Canadians. The Panthers have better goaltending, more physicality, and just enough speed to not get embarrassed by McDavid. Florida in 5.

Ian: I’m not even going to tease you on this one. The Stanley Cup is going back to Canada. I said it last round, and I’ll say it again now. This is Connor McDavid’s year. It’s not because he and Leon are suddenly doing The Intangible Things to win, but because Zach Hyman is the final piece of the puzzle for the Oilers. Hyman can score predictable dirty goals when Edmonton’s uber-talented duo are frustrated by opponents (which is rare, by the way). Florida is fun and they are the Pucks Deep Team of the 2020s, led by the extremely likable Matthew Tkachuk. But there’s no amount of great defense and forechecking that can contain the firepower and speed on Edmonton. Stuart Skinner, I’m sure, will make this interesting, but it’s lookin like it’s The Second Best Connor Mc’s year. Edmonton in 6.

Keith: Florida in 6.

Your turn. Drop [CITY] in [NUMBER OF GAMES] and call us wrong.