Matthew in the Middle | Travel for dummies

Welcome to the summer travel season. This past Memorial Day weekend we had the largest air traffic in history. There are some simple rules that can make your travels easier and even enjoyable.

The first trick is to sign up for a Frequent Flyer number with the airline you fly most frequently. Then download that airline’s app. Now set up your Frequent Flyer number. Your flight status and boarding pass will now show on your smartphone.

If you fly United Air often, I recommend you get the Chase United Club card. Besides getting 50,000 to 100,000 United miles after a minimum spend in your first three months, you get two free checked-in bags and unlimited entry to the United Club Lounge at airports for you and two guests, as long as you each have a United Air boarding pass. I just sent my daughter one of my United Lounge passes and she enjoyed a hot breakfast, coffee, clean bathrooms and access to electrical outlets. The United Lounge has an open bar with hot food and snacks for breakfast, lunch and dinner.

Note: If you’re on vacation, it’s OK to drink in the morning.

Many credit cards come with offers for reimbursement of your $95 TSA Pre-Check fee. Can’t tell you how easy it is to get through TSA screening with Pre-Check. I can leave my shoes and belt on, don’t have to take out my laptop and if you’re traveling through a major airline hub, you don’t have to wait in line for 30-45 minutes to clear TSA. I’ve seen too many TSA screening lines that are hundreds of people long with Disneyland-like snaking lines that go on forever. Just make sure your new romantic interest also has Pre-Check. If she doesn’t have Pre-Check and she has to unlace her knee-high boots, take off her belt and go through “enhanced screening,” she’s not gonna be happy with you 45 minutes later.

If you’re traveling with luggage, plan on being at the airport at least 1½ hours before your departure. Depending on the airport, by the time you get your luggage tagged and dropped off, walk to TSA screening, clear TSA screening, take a tram to the airport boarding gates it could easily take 30-45 minutes. If you go carry-on only, which I highly recommend, plan on arriving at least an hour before your departure. I’ve seen people show up 10 minutes before their departure time, only to see their plane on the tarmac.

Take a marker and write your name and cell number on the exterior of your luggage.

If you fly often, get status with your airline of choice. With United Airlines, the first level of status is “Silver,” which gets you a free checked bag, automatic Board Group 2, and eligible for free upgrades on departure day. Many times, I’ve been upgraded to First Class because of my Silver status.

Let’s close with flying etiquette:

• Hummus, peanut butter and yogurt are considered “liquids” by TSA and will be confiscated.

• You only get 3.4 ounces for your liquid containers. Sorry if you brought a full-sized toothpaste or shampoo as TSA will confiscate them.

• It’s recommended that you bring snacks for your fight, especially if you have children, just no fish.

• Always bring an empty water bottle to fill once you clear TSA.

• No vaping in the airplane bathroom. Vaping is considered “smoking” and you will be arrested.

• Middle seats get the armrests (plural).

• Window seats control the shade.

• Use headphones. No one wants to hear your loud movie.

• No grooming on the flight. No clipping toe nails, painting nails and no cologne or perfume spraying.

• If you wore shoes and socks on the flight, keep them on.

• Always look your flight crew in the eyes when boarding and greet them with a smile. Your flight crew is the law in the air. Do what they say. Do you really want to be a Karen and get arrested because you didn’t want to return your seat in the full upright position?

• You can’t switch seats just because you want to sit next to your friend. Stay in your assigned seat. If you must, ask nicely and offer them your upgraded cabin seat. A $20 bill in your hand might help.

• Finally, be respectful of your flight crew and your fellow passengers. We’re all cramped together in a tight space for a few hours.

We’d Enjoy the friendly skies this summer!

Matthew Owen resides in Eureka and believes the First Amendment allows for free speech. He can be reached at mowen707@gmail.com.