Wife’s plea for her husband: Dialysis ‘is not a way to live’

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Kari Fisher moved to the Markstay area in 2017 with her husband, Christian Lemieux, and their two kids. Immediately, she says she felt comfortable and welcome — she knew she was part of a community.

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Fisher and her husband settled into riverside life in the hamlet. Her parents relocated from Quebec to be close to the children, and Fisher and her husband both joined the volunteer fire department.

Things were going well until last fall. Christian, a type I diabetic since childhood, began to experience swelling in his legs. Doctors initially thought it was related to his vascular system, so he was sent to a heart specialist.

“But it turned out to be his kidneys,” Fisher said. “We found out in the fall his kidneys were failing. It happened so quickly (that) he was on dialysis in February.”

And that is when Fisher really learned about the importance of community.

She said her neighbours and colleagues at the fire hall in Markstay have been incredible.

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“We already felt like we were part of a good community, but it’s gotten so much better. Everyone has been so supportive,” Fisher said. “I’ve gotten so many messages from people, including strangers. Everybody’s reached out to me. I’ve felt so supported throughout all of this.”

Fisher said her family is active. Christian, 38, is a plant operator for Enbridge. They lived an outdoorsy lifestyle that included camping, kayaking, quadding — the good stuff.

But since Christian got sick last year, their lives have gotten small.

“We’re unable to do any of that now,” Fisher said. “He can’t swim; he can’t go on the jet skis or anything where he could get wet or where he’s in the bush. We’re staying close to home. We’ve become homebodies, but we were both very outdoorsy.”

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On home dialysis

When he began dialysis, Christian travelled from Markstay to Health Science North three times per week, for six hours of treatment each time. He is now on home dialysis.

“Every night of the week, he has to hook up by 11 p.m. He goes to bed with it on and wakes up about 10 hours later and disconnects himself,” Fisher explained. “At least now he doesn’t have to go to the hospital.”

Fisher said a room in their home is now devoted to Christian’s medical equipment. There are boxes of equipment “all over the house,” which upsets her children.

“He ends up with spells of really low blood pressure, so he’s fallen a couple of times in front of the children. They, obviously, panicked,” Fisher said. “He’s passed right out in front of them a couple of times. He took out a whole table at one point.”

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While home dialysis is better for Christian, Fisher said “it’s harder on the family, because the kids are there and they see it happening every day.”

Fisher said her children — a boy of five and a girl, aged 11 — are afraid.

Caring for her husband has been emotional at times and as a 911 dispatcher, Fisher said some calls hit really close to home.

“When I’m talking to people in the same situation — people in kidney failure and stuff like that — there’s a constant reminder when they’re calling for ambulances,” she said. “I don’t feel as positive as my husband does, because I see it at work.”

Christian continues to work, but only 12 hours per week. As a result, Fisher said she has taken every shift she can to pay the bills. This has led to feelings of guilt.

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Parents helping

“Between caring for him and taking as many hours as I possibly can at work, I don’t have much time to spend with my children,” she said. “Right now my children really need me, and I’m not being there for them.”

Fisher is working so much to make ends meet, she has turned to her parents.

“I’m not going to have much of a summer with my children, so hopefully their grandparents can take them to do fun things because my husband is not always feeling up to it,” she said. “They’ve really stepped up and we are absolutely blessed to have them. I don’t know how we would do this without them.”

Fisher wants people to realize that not all illnesses are visible. People can look very healthy, even though they are suffering.

“Dialysis is really hard on the system — he feels constantly nauseous, he’s tired, he gets low blood pressure,” Fisher explained. “His blood pressure was so low at one point he had a seizure. He’s not doing well. (Dialysis) is not a way to live.”

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In fact, Fisher said the lifespan of an individual on dialysis is generally about 10 years.

Fisher also wants to raise awareness about her husband’s quest to find a type O kidney.

In Ontario, 1,343 people are currently waiting for an organ (as of June 13), according to the Trillium Gift of Life Network. The government body is responsible for co-ordinating organ and tissue donation and transplant services.

Of that total, nearly 65 per cent — or 867 people — are waiting for a kidney. Like Christian, most who are waiting — nearly 49 per cent, or 424 people — have O type blood.

Across Ontario, from Jan. 1 to May 31, there were a total of 262 organ donors (all organs). Most were deceased at the time of donation; however, there were 116 live donors registered through the Gift of Life Network. The vast majority of transplant operations that were performed in Ontario during that same period, were for kidneys. There were 208 kidney transplant surgeries performed using deceased donors, and 81 transplants from live donors — a total of 289 of the 530 or so transplant surgeries across Ontario concerned the kidney.

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Fisher said Christian is on the waitlist for a deceased donor, but she knows the long-term outcomes are better with a living donor, and the process is quicker.

“We’re hoping to find a living donor. We won’t say no to a deceased donor, but with a deceased donor, we’re looking at three to five years,” she said. “If we were to find a living donor, the process would be over in about a year.”

When Christian first got sick, Fisher said he was very depressed. But his mood and outlook have improved over the past few months.

“He’s positive we’re going to find a match,” she said.

To find out if you are a compatible match for Christian, contact the London Health Sciences Centre at livingkidneydonation@lhsc.on.ca or 519-685-8500 ext. 33552.

mkkeown@postmedia.com

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